Monday, July 16, 2012

Tell God Your Plans If You Want to Make Him Laugh

I am a planner – gifted by God to be an organizer of all the silly little details that the big picture people don’t see or have time to be bothered with. It serves me well in my calling as a church secretary. I’m always trying to think three steps ahead so that the unexpected conflicts, roadblocks and blunders are eliminated, avoided or traversed before the big picture people come anywhere near that junction of God’s work. I pick up the slack when they leap from one mountain to another. If there is something I don’t know, I research or I ask until I know because when the questions start flying – they all land on my desk.

I’m not telling you this to blow my own horn. Those who know me know the truth of that – it’s just not in me to seek the limelight. I’m telling you this so that you have a better understanding of what I am writing about today.

I have been having issues with my herniated discs again and this past week, and though my pain tolerance is pretty high, it finally surpassed my ability to contain and I’ve been stuck at home for the last four days with constant pain that rivals a dislocated shoulder and a knife in the back. Sitting for any length of time is impossible – so much so that I am actually typing this standing up. This is not the first time I’ve had to deal with this problem and I doubt it will be the last. I’ve even factored these kinds of incidences into my work plan so that if I need to miss a couple of days, I will not fall so far behind as I can’t easily catch up. Even as well prepared as I try to be, this could not have happened at a worse time as I have for the last twelve months been looking forward attending the New Wilmington Mission Conference beginning next Saturday. In my current condition I will be unable to attend.

I have been planning this for a year, since I came home from the last one (which I wrote about last year Missionaries and Me at NWMC.) I found the conference to be a place where I can retreat into God’s arms, hear his words, be renewed by his Spirit, and sent out to do his will and I have been feeling a little tapped out in that area lately. See, just like every other person in a relationship – my relationship with God is constantly changing (God isn’t changing, I am and the intimacy or lack of intimacy we share is constantly fluctuating because of me). Like any relationship, it takes hard work to keep it vibrant and growing. If I’m not intentionally seeking God, interacting with him on a daily basis, our relationship grows dim and lifeless, just like any other. These last six weeks, I’ve been holding out for the conference to jump into the river of God’s grace and presence again. I’ve been planning on it and never thought it wouldn’t happen - - - but now, only God knows.

I am still hopeful that God will heal me in time to attend. But if not, I have to believe it is because God’s plan for that week is not what I had in mind. I learned a long time ago that it’s silly to try to convince God of how much better my plan is. However, this is the first time that I feel as if I can accept it before my plan is unrealized and not after. I’m not saying I won’t be disappointed if I can’t go, but I trust that God knows what I need and how that will be best realized in my life far better than I. I trust God’s plan is better than mine.

Actually it’s been a long time since he and I talked about the future and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve given my care over to him in the last two days. Perhaps God just wanted to get started a week early. I don’t know how this will turn out, but I’m sure that if God has anything to do with it, and he does, it will bring us closer together and glory to his name. Blessings and may God’s plans be fulfilled in your life this week. Amen.
About the pictures:
Oakland, PA (July 2009)


Audrey said...

I have always loved the old saying about telling God my plans and making him laugh...but I haven't always loved going through it. Like you I continue to grow in my understanding of my faith and knowing what God wants for me and from me. I hope that if it is God's will, you will go to your conference and return home with new joy for your life. Whatever His plans are, I hope that they include healing comfort for you!

Maureen Profeta said...

Thank you Audrey. Your comments are often a sorce of joy and comfort for me so in a way he has already answered your prayer for me with your kind words.