Monday, August 25, 2014

I Cant See without My Glasses

And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. (Hebrews 1b-3)

I'm not really a morning person. It's not that I'm grouchy, but I do go through the first hour in a fog which is why I have a regular morning routine. I do the same thing every morning the same way making it possible for me to coast through in the half-asleep state I'm in and still walk out the door ready to meet the demands of the day. One of the last things I do before heading out the door is to put on my glasses.

My left eye is near-sighted, my right eye is far-sighted and I have astigmatism in both eyes. That means that the whole world around me is blurry no matter how close or far away it is and with the astigmatism, horizontal lines have a tendency to disappear altogether. You would think that the first thing I would do in my morning routine would be to put on my glasses.

However, when I first wake up, I don't realize how bad my eyesight is. It's normal to me. After all, I see well enough to get around my apartment and it's not like I need to see any details of the furniture, knickknacks or photographs around my home as they've been there for years and I don't see them anymore even when I'm wearing my glasses. It's not until I put my glasses on that I realize how poor my eyesight actually is. So why do I wait? Because at some point I'm going to get in the shower and blow dry my hair and I can't do that with my glasses on and when I take my glasses off, I can't see what I'm doing—I become very aware of just how bad my eyesight is. I find that awareness quite uncomfortable so I wait until I know I won't have to take them off again to put them on.

One morning last week, I actually forgot to put on my glasses and began walking out the door. On my way back down the stairs to get my glasses, I had a sudden realization: Jesus is my focus and my spiritual disciplines—praying, reading the bible, worship, service—these are the framework that holds my focus in front of my eyes so that I can see clearly. When I let distractions take me away from a regular routine of spiritual discipline, I lose my focus and life becomes a little blurry. The line between good and bad, between God’s way and mine begins to disappear and I stumble around in this blurriness crossing way over that line without knowing it.

Removing my glasses, the blurriness will begin to subside after a while as my eyes adjust to trying to focus without my prescription lenses and once again, I think I can see fine until I trip over a cord on the floor I didn’t see, or I run into the doorway because my depth perception is askew. When I let my spiritual disciplines slip my focus begins to move from God to myself. I begin to think that it’s all about me and what I do for God instead of it being all about God and what he has done in me and through me. I want to do my best for God instead of wanting to let God do his best in and through me. I’ll revel in the glory of his amazing work in my life as if it were my triumph instead of his.

That’s why it is so important to keep to those spiritual disciplines—so that my focus is always Jesus. How do you keep your focus?

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